5 months ago
16,944 notes
5 days ago

This poem is not a tweet to me

[ID: A tweet by SheepWaveN. It reads: I'm like "hey let's play magic the gathering" and then ten minutes later my tongue is in the mouth of someone's daughter whose parents still call her son. End ID]

33,648 notes
5 days ago

image

the logic of this is making me laugh a lot 

24,282 notes
5 days ago

The feminine urge to walk into the woods never to return.

The masculine urge to walk into the desert to never return.

The androgynous urge to walk into the ocean to never return.

image

For the oysters.

I can’t believe australian prime minister harold holt was nonbinary

hold on I gotta google something

I probably could've pieced that one together myself tbh

68,770 notes
5 days ago

why do people equate "athletic" with "healthy". every athlete I've ever known has had some serious injury or chronic health problem as a direct result of playing too much sports. I don't mean football players even, I knew a woman who had necrotic bone in her foot from doing too much martial arts as a kid. "Sports Medicine" is an entire specilized profession

to be clear I'm a big believer in people having the freedom to make unhealthy choices. but it's very funny to see people go, "wow! you don't exercise a lot, that's an unhealthy choice! your friend makes healthy choices, which is why he had three concussions before age 18, a notable characteristic of 100% Maximally Healthy People."

3,578 notes
5 days ago

the racism factory has been closed for 80 years. but today smoke started coming from out of the pipes again

8,651 notes
1 week ago

Calling any object I dislike debris regardless of size or purpose

35,595 notes
1 week ago

“how do I taxonomize this???” is too many people’s frantic response to near everything

Mixed up “taxonomy” and “taxidermy” for a second and was momentarily transfixed by the apparent issue of people frantically and indiscriminately performing taxidermy

13,204 notes
1 week ago

them :)

8,799 notes
2 weeks ago
14,893 notes
2 weeks ago

Beffen (infinitive, ik/I bef, jij/you beft) is the Dutch verb meaning to perform cunnilingus, if that helps.

It surely does.

44,350 notes